By Danaé Reid
Dear Danaé,
Our desire to exist beyond the limitations of society has afforded us an immaculate life. As a child, we were never stifled or discouraged from self-expression — which we must thank our parents for — and as adults, we have vowed to continue that truthfulness in all things.
The external pressures of identity have threatened to fortify our fortress on several different occasions, but we’ve had the ability to navigate those spaces and use those experiences to find out who we truly are and what we stand for. As of today, we possess a certain quality of oneness that refuses to let us feel anything less than confident and self-assured. It’s a badge we wear with honor, because we have worked hard to get here.
As we approach 26, we cannot help but to laugh at the stupid mistakes we’ve made, marvel at the way God has glided us into 2.5 decades of life, cringe over some of our less favorable moments, and look towards the delicious future that we anticipate. Our 25th year was big for us: spiritually, mentally, emotionally, and professionally, which raises a question: can a person lose themselves before knowing who they are? And then, if you’re a person who is ever-evolving, is it possible to ever fully know yourself?
Our understanding about many things has changed rapidly, especially over the past six months. For example, six months ago, we were happy and fulfilled, but now, that feeling has grown beyond the scope of our imagination. As a person who thinks a lot, the whole concept of being more content today than we were six months ago makes me question whether or not we were ever truly happy before. But after giving it some thought, I believe happiness works in levels. The happier you are, the happier you get.
Familial relations create the framework for who we are and how we operate. We were blessed with a strong supportive and loving family, but the family order has played a role in the warped sense of self we once carried. Being the only female grandchild surrounded by men who’d do anything for you, have protected you relentlessly, and catered to you because of your identity, gave you this idea that the entire world would carry on in that way. You expected people to chase you, which was the ax in one or two meaningful relationships, and your lack of ability to take accountability may have soured a few whiskeys that were meant to be neat.
We have learned the order of things and have made peace with the things of our past – This has been reflected in our behavior at present. We listen more, we love softer, we fill the spaces we occupy to capacity, and we stand firm in the convictions and the the truths we hold. We do not allow anything less than love in our space and we hold a hand up to anything that dares threaten the space we’ve called home. We are more receptive, more kind, slower to speak, quicker to understand. It’s different, but it’s good.
Our understanding of love has been changed as a nod to the growth and experiences we’ve endured. What does it mean to be loving? What does it mean to have and give it?
God is at the forefront of all decisions. Our unyielding desire to talk with him and acknowledge his presence has played the grandest role in this film. Because of him, we have reached beautiful and bountiful heights in arenas we’d never thought to occupy, and what is more, he continues to reassure us that we’ve barely scratched the surface. We no longer play small and we have accepted the fact that we were ready much before we knew we were.
Our words are important. Our stories are important. Our work is important. We remain in a state of humility because we know that the creator of all is the cause of the beautiful life we lead. We know that we are but a beacon of his goodness and that we’re meant to share our stories and our truths to inspire others.
You are a beautiful person. We are a powerful spirit.
We had no idea that we’d get here, but we did… and I am so proud of you, me, us.
Thank you.
From Danaé, with love
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